


Saving Loki

by toggledog



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Awesome Frigga, Canon Divergence - Thor (2011), M/M, Outdoor Sex, Parent Frigga, Pre-Thor (2011), Pseudo-Incest, Suicidal Thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-03
Updated: 2015-01-03
Packaged: 2018-03-05 03:37:29
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,582
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3104114
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/toggledog/pseuds/toggledog
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>(Pre Thor AU) Loki has not been himself, of late. While riding on the Asgardian plains, Thor gains the temporary ability to read Loki's mind and discovers that he is seriously contemplating suicide. Thor is determined to help Loki, only is not certain as to how.<br/>Prompt Fill</p>
            </blockquote>





	Saving Loki

**Author's Note:**

  * For [reader4books](https://archiveofourown.org/users/reader4books/gifts).



“So resolute was young Fandral here, to impress the ladies of the light elf court, that he determined to do a back flip off the balustrade and land, what he thought would be, _gracefully_ onto the throne room floor below.” Volstagg stood on top of the vast banquet table, one foot wedged between two bowls of fruit, the other almost planted in the middle of the face of an untimely demised beast. The mead he held in his hand had been, at the beginning of the story, full to the brim. Now, so much had splashed onto the feast below, that he did not realise he had an empty mug,until he held it to his mouth to drink, realised there was nothing inside, and then threw it onto the table, with a bellow of discontentment. This, in turn, caused more laughter from the four warriors surrounding him, who also held flagons, of varying amounts of mead, in their hands.  
“I would have done it. I just... my courage left me, at the last second.” Fandral said, sheepishly.  
Thor took a heavy gulp of his own mead, burped then asked, “So, what happened?”  
“It was, indeed, incredible to watch. He leapt off the balcony, half turned then fell straight down, slamming face-first into the floor below.”  
Thor, Hogun and Sif, roared with laughter. Fandral smirked.  
“Ah, the mark of a true warrior. Being content to be made a fool of.” Thor said.  
“It is fortunate for you that Loki is not here, to hear that tale. You would be teased about it, for many a year to come. Even more than we, undoubtedly will.” Sif said. Thor, Hogun and Volstaff laughed, concurring.

“Now that I think of it, I have not seen him much, of late.” Sif said.  
“Nor have I.” Thor admitted. Though it was normal for Loki to occasionally disappear, for long periods of time, claiming the need for solitude, he could not think of the last time that he actually spent a goodish amount of time with him. An arrow of guilt pierced at his heart. He looked to the others, who bore similar expressions of remorse. Thor finished his tankard and excused himself from the room, resolved to locate his brother.  
After a thorough search of the palace and the gardens surrounding, he realised that Loki could, in fact, be in the first place he should have searched, to begin with;  
in his chambers.  
Thor turned around and rerouted, moving swiftly through the tapestry lined corridors. Finally, he reached the familiar broad double doors and knocked. No sound issued from inside. He knocked again. Nothing.  
Frowning, he pushed the doors open and stepped inside. In the middle of the room sat a large, four poster bed. There, on top of the covers, lay Loki. Thor moved further into the room, closing the doors behind himself. Demi-gods of his ilk rarely slept; indeed, they had no need for rest, bar times of preparation for, or coming back from, battle. Yet, here lay his brother, curled up onto his side, light breath going in and out, black hair a fan across his pillow. Thor took a moment to admire how serene he appeared, in his stillness, then grinned to himself, grabbed his brother's leg and yanked it, hard. Loki awoke instantly, groaning, as Thor threw him off the bed and onto the ground.  
“You dare slumber on such a day!” He walked over to the thick window drapes directly behind the bed and threw them open, allowing the brightest star to shine it's warmth, and light, into the room. Loki cried out, covered his eyes, and crawled back onto the mattress.  
“Leave me alone.”  
“Come now,” he grinned, watching Loki settle himself, this time pulling the covers over himself. “It is far too welcoming a day to spend it idly.” He grabbed the covers and pulled them down to Loki's feet.  
“I said LEAVE ME!”  
Thor felt a great force suddenly throw him back, across the room and through the double doors into the corridor. He landed heavily against the tapestry directly opposite Loki's chambers but managed to pick himself up before he fell. Standing, watching the now closed (and presumably now locked) double doors, Thor felt some indignation. It had been a long time since Loki had used his powers against him.  
He told himself if Loki wanted to act as a youngling then that was fine by him. He absolutely did not care.  
No, he was not concerned in the least, he told himself, ignoring the worry nestling in his heart.  
*  
At the feast, that night, he looked across to Loki, seated on the other side of the grand banquet table, between two dignitaries. Loki was not eating anything on his plate. As Thor watched, he moved the succulent food around the crockery, with his fingers. For the first time, Thor noticed how scrawny Loki appeared. Loki had always been slighter than him but he now looked positively skeletal, skin stretched tight over bone, eyes dark with shadows.  
“Are you not going to eat something?” He called out, across the table.  
Loki looked up, appearing startled.  
“I'm not hungry.” He pushed his plate away from himself.  
Thor found his gaze turned to Sif, who sat a few places down, looking at Loki with concern. At the other end of the table, sat Odin and Frigga. Frigga was also looking at Loki, a slight frown touching her lips.  
Thor felt his enormous heart start to hammer. Something was not right.  
“We will go riding, tomorrow. Just me and you.” He said to Loki.  
“I do not wish it.” Loki spoke so quietly that Thor could barely hear him over the noise of the two dozen or so dining companions.  
Thor was now convinced. He had done something to offend his brother. This would explain why he was not talking to him.  
 _And the sleeping and not eating?_  
Thor banished such thoughts.  
“I would very much like it if you would accompany me.”  
He noticed his friends watching this exchange, with varying degrees of wariness.  
Loki sighed. “If that is your wish.”  
*  
Thor and Loki rode out on first light. The morning sun slowly made her entrance into day, dappling the sky with pinks, purples and reds.  
“Ah it has been too long, since I have looked upon such beauty.” Thor admitted.  
Loki did not reply. Thor slammed his mouth shut.

They travelled further through the Asgardian plains, Loki silent the entire time. Thor urged his horse to move faster, his frustration propelling his body to greater urgency; to simply ride, ride for as fast and long as he could.  
He realised he was riding towards the edge of the cliffs of Arorak and urged his horse to slow down. The horse neighed and lifted it's front legs up in the air. Thor gripped his thighs tight to avoid falling off. Then the horse then bucked its back legs up. He flew straight over the creature's head, landing in a clump of bushes, nearby. For a moment, he lay there, stunned. Then he realised the flowers had burst open, covering him in alien green goo. Groaning, he was attempting to wipe the sticky mixture off his body, when he heard Loki's voice.  
 _“Do it. Just do it!”_  
“Loki!” He called out. “Where are you?”  
 _“You stupid fool! It's only one step! Are you that much of a dunce that you can't even take that one step? Just one step and total oblivion. You would not even be considered for the gilded halls of Valhalla, if you do it. Yes, oblivion would be a blessed relief.”_  
Thor felt an odd chill crawl up his spine. He had the distinct impression that Loki was not talking to him.  
He would deal with the alien substance on his body later. Picking himself up, he noticed a slim, dark haired figure a hundred or so lengths from where he stood.  
 _“There is not need to be afraid. The pain will end.”_  
Thor started running. Loki stood at the edge of the cliffs. Right at the edge. If he mistepped, he'd fall right down, the rocks and wild water below smashing his body into a thousand little pieces.  
“Loki!” He reached out and touched his hand.  
 _“Thor! Oh no, he cannot know! He must not know!”_  
Two things were suddenly apparent. Though Loki spoke, his mouth did not move. Secondly, Loki's face was damp with tears.  
Thor felt the chill now circle around the base of his neck. He now knew what was happening, but was amiss as to how.  
He was somehow reading Loki's thoughts.  
Loki pulled away, stepping thankfully away from the cliff's edge.  
 _“Stupid thought! Not in front of him. Do you wish to traumatise him? No, better to go some place quiet. Perhaps your chambers. Yes, that would be more fitting.”_  
“Loki...” Thor couldn't think of a single thing to say to him. He felt utterly overcome by what he was hearing; alone and helpless in how to even respond and assuaged by utter guilt that he had not noticed before that his own brother felt this way.  
“What is that on your face?”  
“What?”  
“Are you trying to brighten up your already substantial beauty?”  
 _“Silly Thor.”_  
Thor grabbed his cloak and started to wipe his face with it.  
 _“He doesn't know, does he? About me. About what I am.”_  
Thor completed wiping the remainder of the substance off his face and hands.  
“What is it?”  
“What is what?”  
Thor closed his mouth. Nothing. He looked into Loki's green eyes. Clearly, he could see the intelligence working, the mind speaking. Only, it no longer spoke to him.  
He considered how he would feel, if he discovered that someone had intruded upon his most private thoughts. No, better to not let Loki in on what he now knew  
“I wish to go back to the palace.” He admitted.  
“As do I.”  
*  
As soon as they reached beyond the palace walls, Thor came upon Sif, standing in the courtyard and practising her fencing against a wooden pillar. Thor jumped off his horse.  
“Take them to the stables, will you?” He ordered Loki, who cast him a look of disdain and opened his mouth, as though wanting to say something, but then simply did as Thor bid.

Thor went up to Sif.  
“I need you to do a favour for me,” he said, before she even opened her mouth to greet him. “Keep Loki here. I don't care what you need to do. But he cannot leave your sight.”  
“You're worried about him, aren't you?”  
Thor blinked, startled at her perceptiveness.  
“As am I.”  
He considered telling her what he had learnt, that afternoon, but decided against it. For Loki's sake, the less people who knew, the better.  
“I know that something pains him greatly,” Sif said. “I will do as you asked.”  
*  
He located her in one of the drawing rooms. She sat by a fireplace, a book in hand. As Thor came further into the room, he noticed, by the cover, that it was a book of old Norse legends, from midgard.  
“Come, sit by the fire, my son.”  
Thor felt too jittery to sit down. Frigga placed her book down on the table beside her chair and stood up.  
“What is it?”  
Thor opened his mouth, closed it then closed his eyes.  
“It is Loki. He...”  
A sudden gush of sorrow overwhelmed him. He could not help the sobs that tore from his throat, the cascade of tears down his face.  
“Tell me all.” She said, gently taking his hands in hers.  
Thor started from the night before, him coming into Loki's room to find him sleeping, then noticing him not eating, at the feast.  
“I, too, have noticed his lack of appetite. I have tried to speak to him but he refuses to converse with me,” Frigga said, frowning. “Continue.”  
Thor then went on to the outing that day, him landing in the bushes, after the horse was spooked; the odd substance covering his hands and face, somehow causing him to be able to, momentarily, hear Loki's thoughts.  
“Frangena Lupis. It is a vary rare flower. The plant grows for one day every hundred years, then withers. Even then, the flowers only burst if the day is of a very specific temperature. If one touches the nectar, as you did, then it can cause enhanced abilities, while the nectar is touching the flesh. In your case, the ability to read the mind of the one closest to you.”  
“Perhaps it was fated. Because the thoughts he was having... “ he paused. “He berated himself for not having the courage to jump off the cliff.”  
Frigga took a deep intake of breath.  
“I ran towards him. Thankfully, he stepped back. Then he thought he couldn't... not while I was there. He would do it in a quieter place. His room.”  
Frigga started to stride towards the entrance. “Where is he now?”  
“I have left him with Sif, with instructions to not let him out of her sight.”  
“That is very wise of you. Of all your friends, she is the most trustworthy. Take me to him. We must make sure he does not go anywhere alone.” She said.  
“There is something else. He thought that I did not know the truth about him. What does that mean?”  
Frigga stopped walking, withdrawing her hand, from where it rested on the door handle.  
“Yes, yes this may come a long way towards explaining his current disposition.” She paused. “It is time that you knew the truth of his parentage.”  
“Parentage?”

Frigga turned and looked at him directly, ensnaring him in her focused gaze.  
“Loki is not your blood brother. He is of frost giant blood.”  
Thor tried to fathom what he had just been told. The one he had jousted, laughed, teased, had many a merriment, argued and caroused with.  
Not a blood relation.  
“In the wars against the frost giants, Odin found Loki, a mere baby, too small to defend himself, left out to die. Odin could not bear to leave him to such a fate, so brought him here, in the hopes of one day uniting the two worlds, in betrothal.”  
“Loki is not my true brother.” Thor whispered.  
“Of late, Loki was starting to guess the truth. I did not doubt that one day, he would discover it so. After all, none equal him, in regards to intelligence. He confronted Odin about his true parentage. Odin told him the truth.” She reached out and took Thor's hands, once more. “Loki is my son. I do not care as to who birthed him.”  
“And he is my brother.”  
Beneath the shock, he could not help but feel a seed of joy germinate within himself. For many a year, as Loki matured to adulthood, Thor started to notice him in a way that was most unbrotherly. Thor now realised that, of late, he had been distancing himself from his brother, ashamed as to his lustful feelings towards him.  
Only now he felt vindicated. Loki was not of his blood.  
“We must talk to him, convince him that he is loved.” Frigga said.  
Thor frowned, looked down towards mjolnir.  
“Action is more your strength,it is true,” Frigga said. “In your actions, you will help Loki to slowly climb out of the current dark, despondent well that he has slipped into.”  
“I will do everything that I can.” Thor said.  
*  
When they returned to the palace courtyard, Sif and Loki were sparring, the female warrior with some gusto, Loki with much less enthusiasm. Thor and Frigga stood a moment, a little ways off, watching them. Though not as skilled as Thor or his friends, Loki was always a rather competent fencer. Seeing him now, Thor could not help but feel a little mesmerised by the fluidity and grace of his movements.  
“Loki!” Frigga said, somewhat sternly.  
Loki and Sif both pointed their swords to the ground, the former looking rather bewildered.  
“My son.” Frigga said more gently, as she stepped up to him and tenderly grasped his face in her hands. “My beloved son. Come, Loki, I wish to speak to you.” She let go of his face and took one of his hands. With the other, he sheathed his sword.  
“I wish to speak to him also, when you are done.” Thor said. Frigga turned to him and nodded, then lead Loki out of the courtyard. Both Sif and Thor watched them go.  
“Let us practice.” Sif said. Thor nodded, and took out his own sword from its holster.  
 _Anything to not think about my brother's woes._  
*  
Loki and Frigga came out into the courtroom quite some time later. Thor and Sif instantly resheathed their swords. They had not mentioned Loki, during their swordplay, which had been uncharacteristically sombre, without the usual laughter and teasing attending it. However, now that Loki stood before them, Sif seemed to intuit exactly what Thor wished of her. She gave him a brief nod, them started to move away, back into the palace.  
“Loki,” Thor stepped closer to his brother. He noticed that Loki's eyes were red and swollen, from recently shed tears. Frigga put her arm around his shoulders and kissed his cheek.  
“Remember what I told you,” she said, then looked at Thor. “I will take my leave.”  
For a moment, both Thor and Loki stood, watching each other.  
“Come, Loki,” Thor patted him on the arm. “I wish to finish our earlier walk.”  
Loki slowly nodded, allowing Thor to lead him to the stables.  
*  
Thor waited until they were far from the palace walls (and ears) to speak to Loki. He trotted his horse directly alongside him.  
“Loki....” He frowned, not even sure where to start.  
“Frigga said she told you of my true parentage,” Loki said, quietly. “Everything I know is a lie.”  
“Loki...”  
Yes, great start! Thor berated himself.  
“You are to be king in two week's time. I will never be king.” Loki was silent a long moment, as Thor still tried to think of something useful to say. “I do not believe that you are worthy to be king. But Odin does not see it. He is too enamoured with his favourite.”  
Thor could not help but rise to Loki’s challenge. “I will make a fine and just king!”  
Loki looked away from him, eyes blank, a single tear rolling down his face.  
"Loki, listen to me. Nothing of importance is a lie. I am still your brother.”  
“You are not my brother! Nor is Frigga truly my mother!”  
“I still love you more than the nine worlds combined. I cannot speak for Frigga, but I am certain that she would make a similar pronouncement.”  
Thor looked around himself. Stark plains as far as the eye could see.  
“Loki I admit to not knowing how to help you! I know that earlier, standing at the edge of that cliff, you wished to end your life.”  
More tears ran down Loki's face.  
“I am sorry, I am so sorry for what I am.”  
“What you are? A being of such intelligence and majesty and beauty, that draws all into his great light.”  
“No.” Loki shook his head. “I am nothing. A burden to you.”  
“Loki you are _everything_ to me. I am sorry if I have been inactive in my attentions. I admit to my selfishness. Please forgive me. Please.” He reached out between them and momentarily took one of Loki's hands from where it gripped the horse's reins. “Let us get off and walk a while. The horses will keep.”  
Both jumped off. For a moment, Loki moved his hands about, in the air. Thor stared at him, mystified.  
“I am creating an illusion for the horses, that they are in an enclosed meadow, with hay and water. Yes, they will keep.”  
Thor could not help but grin. “This is exactly what I speak of.”  
Loki loudly sighed. “Why do you care? We are not even brothers.”  
Thor placed an arm around his shoulders. “No, we are not. Not in blood, anyway. Loki.” He kissed his cheek, as Frigga had done. “Please do not leave me.”  
 _If you were not here..._  
Thor thought of his most valued companion, who had been with him, in both his most joyous of occasions and his bitterest. It was Loki who laughed with him, in the glorious feast after their first, successful battle against the Fire Demons. Loki was the one who comforted him, after Hela took one of his closest childhood friends back to Valhalla, following the second battle.  
Loki, with whom he both jested and fought with, with whom he had more than once fantasied about smacking repeatedly about the head, with whom he'd also had more intimate fantasies.  
Loki, who he could not even fathom the thought of spending the rest of eternity, without him by his side.  
Thor felt a sudden, avalanche of deep pain wash over him.  
If Loki had succeeded in his quest for self harm...  
“Please don't leave me...” He choked, pulling the startled Loki to him and burying his face in his neck, wetting the flesh with his tears. “I will do anything, anything at all, to help you overcome this malady.”  
Thor kissed Loki's neck, the salty taste of his own tears on his lips. He gently cupped the delicate face, kissed his cheeks, his chin, his forehead, his lips.  
He felt Loki's arms go around him, Loki's tongue snake into his mouth. Both collapsed to their knees, mouths still locked. Thor could now taste the salt of both of their tears, as their tongues continued to battle for domination. He gently eased Loki onto his back, gently tugging at his clothes. The thought that they were out in the open, in the wild Asgardian plains, for anyone to come across them, only spurred him to greater heights of excitement.  
“Please, Thor. Please...” Loki whispered, pulling open Thor's leggings to reach his erect cock.  
Thor grabbed Loki's leggings and pulled them down and off, flinging them aside, as he pushed the long legs open. Loki cooperated by crossing his legs around Thor's waist.  
Thor groaned, placing one thick finger in the tiny opening, reaching further in, to press hard against Loki's sweet spot.  
“Yes...” Loki whispered again. Thor jabbed at the spot again and again, causing Loki to buck up, hand still jerking at Thor's cock.  
“Yes...”  
Thor took the supple lips in a kiss once more, as he tenderly placed a second finger inside, scissoring with the first.  
There was no thought as to the sudden progression to their relationship. Indeed, it seemed as natural as any time they had fought or jested in the past.  
“Need you, please.”  
Thor withdrew his fingers and lined himself up, tenderly breaching the opening. Loki hissed in discomfort. Thor ceased in his movement, deliberately stilling, reaching down to grip at Loki's erection, stroking it with almost brutal rhythm. Loki started to thrust up into his hand. Thor took this as a sign to move slowly, ever so slowly into his body. Finally, buried to the hilt, he lay, gasping, kissing Loki's ear. He started to move, gently rocking.  
“Are you alright?” He asked the gasping Loki.  
“Keep going.” Loki begged.  
Grinning, Thor moved a little faster, Loki started to rock in time with him.  
“Yes...” Thor sighed, overcome with the tightness surrounding his cock, the soft hair in his fingers, the muscles, overlayed with soft flesh under his mouth and teeth.  
He moved faster, hearing Loki's moans start to grow louder, his cock slick with precome.  
“Thor... Thor...” Loki moaned, causing him to groan, gripping Loki's hip as he moved, deliberately pounding the sweet spot, that caused his partner to shiver with desire.  
Loki's trembling increased.  
“Oh Loki...” Thor moaned, as he felt Loki piston up and down, crying out, as the warmth of his release hit Thor's stomach. Thor felt himself let go, sailing high, almost into the seas of Valhalla, itself, feeling himself release deep into his lover. He collapsed against Loki, hands still buried in his hair. He was vaguely aware of Loki's hand gripping his ass, wet tears on his own cheeks. Feeling languid and content, he gently kissed the still trembling Loki on the lips, once more.  
“I love you, so much. So so much.”  
“I have wanted this for such a long time,” Loki said. “I did not care that we were brothers.”  
Thor was suddenly aware of the sand under Loki's back. “You must be uncomfortable.” He said.  
“I am in bliss.” Loki said.

Both were silent a long moment, content to lie together.  
“Loki, I have an idea. We were both brought up to rule, then why shouldn't this be so?” Thor said. “I will go to Odin and ask that we both be crowned. That we both rule. Together.”  
“You would do this?” Loki looked astonished.  
Thor bent down and kissed him once more.  
*  
On the day of his coronation, Thor could not have envisioned that he could be more joyous. He stood, alongside the one who would be equal ruler to him, just outside the great hall, where he could hear the the buzz of the throngs of Asgardians, lined up to see the new rulers.  
Though, in the last few days, the warriors three had all expressed deep concerns to him about allowing Loki to rule with him, Sif had been the only one to tell him the opposite. The day before, she told him that she had a dream that Thor had been chosen to rule alone. This then caused Loki, overcome with jealousy and bitterness, to cause a war between Asgard and the Frost Giants. In the dream, she explained, Thor was banished to midgard and Loki had ruled in his stead.  
“It was a dark dream,” she said. “Full of wanton death. Loki was broken in a way that I suspected would never be fixed. But, I feel that you have circumvented this fate by allowing him to rule with you.”  
Thor now turned to Loki, his lover as well as confident. He had, in the past few days, regained his weight back. Though Loki was still taken to fits of despondency, he now seeked refuge with Frigga, with whom he could talk his feelings out with, Sif, with whom he could joust and let his aggressions out, and Thor, with whom he could do all three, but also let his emotions out in a more primal, intimate level.  
“I realise that I am more than joyous to share some of the responsibilities of ruling with the one that I love.” Thor said.  
Loki smiled. “I wonder how you would respond, if I told you that I had planned to allow three frost giants into Asgard, to create a little havoc? You would then have, undoubtedly waged war against the frost giants, proving your unfitness to rule.”  
Thor's smile faltered.  
“I am jesting.” Loki smiled. “If that was my plan, there would be no need of it now, would there? Together, we will be more than adequate for Asgard.”  
“You are, indeed, a mystery my love.” Thor shook his head.  
Loki's smile widened, that mischievous lightening up of his face, that Thor so adored.  
“Come Thor.” He leant forward and pecked him on the lips. “Let us set forth to our destiny.”

Finis.

**Author's Note:**

> So, have I, essentially, just written Thor out of ever needing to join the Avengers? Hm...  
> Hope you enjoyed it. As stated, this is a prompt fill.


End file.
